Monday, August 18, 2014
Beginning Again
It's the end of another summer. The boys and I have been doing what we love to do this summer - play in the water. I have to say this has been my favorite summer yet. We were in Tennessee for a month helping my mom during her knee surgery recovery, but once we were back, we hit the water park! I have so many pictures of us on the way. The boys have fished, swam, and played. They are happy and healthy. Ready to start a new school year. God has truly blessed us. I don't know what Inwould be doing with my life without them.
Tuesday, July 29, 2014
Time Flies
It is so sad to me I haven't posted in this blog in so long. It's almost been two years! Our lives have been busy and things have flown by since then.
Jaxon was diagnosed with hearing loss. He now wears hearing aids to help. He is a growing young man who is getting ready to enter 2nd grade! Can you believe it?! I can't.
Bayker is a growing young man. He starts 6th grade this year. Yes, Middle School!!! I can't handle it! I'm not sure what I'm going to do when I drop him off on the first day of school. It's going to be like dropping my child off in a war zone. I don't know why I think that way. I guess it is because he is growning and as children grow they can get mean. I'm just hoping he does well and keeps his head held high.
Stephen is still working at the cancer center. He gets stressed sometimes with all of the demands in what he is doing, but God will give him strength. He is such an intelligent man. God has equipped him with these abilities for a reason.
And I....well, I finally graduated with my Bachelor's Degree in Eduation. I still have to finish my Master's degree to be licensed, but I'm just happy with this accomplishment. I worry I won't be able to find a job if I should need one, but God will provide.
Life is going on, and we are choosing to live it!
Monday, December 24, 2012
All We Need Is Love
I have felt so compelled to write this morning. I don't know why. I guess it's because of the season and the reason for the season.
It's seems like lately there have been so many things going on in my life. I am enrolled full-time as a student; I'm a mother, wife, daughter, sister, and sister-in-law; and I'm involved in my son's school PTO. I never thought I would be doing so many things at one time. I feel like I'm being pulled in more ways than one.
As a student, I feel compelled to be the best, to perform the best, and to succeed. As a mother and wife, I feel so inadequate. I've let the dishes and laundry go. If not for the wonderful person, I now call my friend, who comes and cleans my house, it would never be cleaned. As far as the PTO, I have felt liked I've helped and then feel like I haven't done enough. I think in all of these things we feel the need to be more than what we can be. We want to perform at the top level in our studies. We want to be the golden mother who is able to sew a quilt, make breakfast, dinner, and lunch, get out all of those Christmas cards, buy the best presents for your child's teachers for Christmas while remembering everyone in your life with a small gift as well and all doing this at one time. Along with all of this, you want to be in the best social groups you can, because you know this is the only chance your child will ever have at being recognized in the school for what they can do or ever know what is going on in town. You want to be able to see family and make everything right for them in their lives as well as love everyone around you - even that person most people don't want to even be around (because most of the time, I feel like this is me). But, does all of this really matter?
I have been reflecting over the last weeks about the 20 babies who were killed in Sandy Hook. I think about what our priorities are in life. So many people want to look down on others. So many people don't fit in even though they are "in". Does it really matter what social group you are in? Does it really matter how much money you make? Does it really matter if you even have a home or if you are living with someone else just to get by? Does it matter if you want to be more in your life or is it ok to be content with where you are in life? Does it matter if you were able to take a huge trip for Christmas or if you just made a meal and stayed home with family? And why do we always feel like we have to keep up with the Jones? When the truth is, the Jones are trying to keep up with someone else. Is it good just to be happy with who you are and what you have or do you have to "keep moving forward" and getting the biggest, latest, and greatest in the world? As I reflect on this Christmas, I look at what it important - people. My 9 year old son said it best the other day, "I can't wait to see our family. That's what's important." Yes, it is the people in our lives that are important. Don't let anyone ever make you feel less than you are, because underneath all of the clothes, cars, money, and social groups is a person just like you. They came into this world with the same type of body you did. They came into this world and breathed the same air you do. They came into this world and are just like you.
Now, Jesus came into this world. He didn't have a great place to lay. He didn't have clothes or a nice hospital to be born in. He came into this world with the same body you and I have. A body that knew hurt and pain. A body that felt disappointment and heartache. He was a carpenter. Now, my dad was a carpenter. He worked everyday from daylight to dark. He would come home tired and ready to rest from lifting wood and hammering nails all day. I'm sure Jesus felt this way sometimes. I'm sure he came home ready to do nothing but rest. Jesus came into this world to save the world. What do we do when we come into this world? Do we come to condemn people for what they don't have? Do we come into this world to make a difference? We all came into this world the same way, and we will all leave the same way. But the difference is what? How much money we have? What car we drive? No, it's what we are going to do for those around us. Are we going to shun someone because they don't have the same amount of money or social status as we do? Are we going to love the unlovable? Jesus did. He came that we might have life and have it more abundantly. Does that mean money and wealth? No, that means peace and love for each other. Do I go to school to reach some social status or be labeled as a teacher? No, I am a college student, because I see boys and girls who need someone to come in, see what they know, and help them to understand everything better. Am I a mother, because I want to be able to fit in to this group that so many other women fit into, and often leave those who don't have children out of? No, I want to love my children and teach them to love others. I want them to try and change the world with what God has given them to do. Am I a wife because I want to be - well, yes, I am a wife because I want to be. I want to have a husband and love him and he love me. Now, do I work in the PTO because I want to met a social status? I want to change my son's school and have everyone involved. I want to see all parents come into our school with pride that they have some part in making the child's education better.
Now, what does this have to do with anything? We need to love each other. We need to look at each other through eyes of only a Savior could. We need to be able to put aside the luxuries in life and see people as people. Yes, people are mean, and no we don't have all of the same ideas about what should be done, but we are all the same. We came into this world the same, and we will all go out the same. Whether we are in a pine box or in the most expensive casket or monument available, we all will die. Now, what will you do what the in between? The moment between your birth and your death. Will you love others or will you only look for what you can do to get ahead?
The families of Sandy Hook Elementary are mourning the death of their children. Do you think they are really concerned about how much money they have? Do you think they are concerned for what they will be doing next week at the school PTO? Do you think they are concerned about the value of their home or the car they are driving? They are only concerned with the loss of a child they will never see again this side of Heaven. So many people are asking why something like this could happen. Do you think it's because of gun laws or the mentally ill or because of a learning disability? No, it's because somewhere along the way someone forgot to show the love of Jesus to someone. Maybe it was the killer's mother or father. Maybe it was a teacher or a friend. May he didn't make the grade or reach what he thought was the place he needed to be in life. Maybe he was made fun of for being "different" when the truth of the matter is that none of us are truly alike in our minds. We were all raised and influenced by different people. If we all were influenced by the same people the same way, we would all be the same.
We just need to pray and ask God to help us to love others as He'd love them. Yes, there are things we need to stay away from, but we can love people and be concerned for their souls. We need to love people.
It's seems like lately there have been so many things going on in my life. I am enrolled full-time as a student; I'm a mother, wife, daughter, sister, and sister-in-law; and I'm involved in my son's school PTO. I never thought I would be doing so many things at one time. I feel like I'm being pulled in more ways than one.
As a student, I feel compelled to be the best, to perform the best, and to succeed. As a mother and wife, I feel so inadequate. I've let the dishes and laundry go. If not for the wonderful person, I now call my friend, who comes and cleans my house, it would never be cleaned. As far as the PTO, I have felt liked I've helped and then feel like I haven't done enough. I think in all of these things we feel the need to be more than what we can be. We want to perform at the top level in our studies. We want to be the golden mother who is able to sew a quilt, make breakfast, dinner, and lunch, get out all of those Christmas cards, buy the best presents for your child's teachers for Christmas while remembering everyone in your life with a small gift as well and all doing this at one time. Along with all of this, you want to be in the best social groups you can, because you know this is the only chance your child will ever have at being recognized in the school for what they can do or ever know what is going on in town. You want to be able to see family and make everything right for them in their lives as well as love everyone around you - even that person most people don't want to even be around (because most of the time, I feel like this is me). But, does all of this really matter?
I have been reflecting over the last weeks about the 20 babies who were killed in Sandy Hook. I think about what our priorities are in life. So many people want to look down on others. So many people don't fit in even though they are "in". Does it really matter what social group you are in? Does it really matter how much money you make? Does it really matter if you even have a home or if you are living with someone else just to get by? Does it matter if you want to be more in your life or is it ok to be content with where you are in life? Does it matter if you were able to take a huge trip for Christmas or if you just made a meal and stayed home with family? And why do we always feel like we have to keep up with the Jones? When the truth is, the Jones are trying to keep up with someone else. Is it good just to be happy with who you are and what you have or do you have to "keep moving forward" and getting the biggest, latest, and greatest in the world? As I reflect on this Christmas, I look at what it important - people. My 9 year old son said it best the other day, "I can't wait to see our family. That's what's important." Yes, it is the people in our lives that are important. Don't let anyone ever make you feel less than you are, because underneath all of the clothes, cars, money, and social groups is a person just like you. They came into this world with the same type of body you did. They came into this world and breathed the same air you do. They came into this world and are just like you.
Now, Jesus came into this world. He didn't have a great place to lay. He didn't have clothes or a nice hospital to be born in. He came into this world with the same body you and I have. A body that knew hurt and pain. A body that felt disappointment and heartache. He was a carpenter. Now, my dad was a carpenter. He worked everyday from daylight to dark. He would come home tired and ready to rest from lifting wood and hammering nails all day. I'm sure Jesus felt this way sometimes. I'm sure he came home ready to do nothing but rest. Jesus came into this world to save the world. What do we do when we come into this world? Do we come to condemn people for what they don't have? Do we come into this world to make a difference? We all came into this world the same way, and we will all leave the same way. But the difference is what? How much money we have? What car we drive? No, it's what we are going to do for those around us. Are we going to shun someone because they don't have the same amount of money or social status as we do? Are we going to love the unlovable? Jesus did. He came that we might have life and have it more abundantly. Does that mean money and wealth? No, that means peace and love for each other. Do I go to school to reach some social status or be labeled as a teacher? No, I am a college student, because I see boys and girls who need someone to come in, see what they know, and help them to understand everything better. Am I a mother, because I want to be able to fit in to this group that so many other women fit into, and often leave those who don't have children out of? No, I want to love my children and teach them to love others. I want them to try and change the world with what God has given them to do. Am I a wife because I want to be - well, yes, I am a wife because I want to be. I want to have a husband and love him and he love me. Now, do I work in the PTO because I want to met a social status? I want to change my son's school and have everyone involved. I want to see all parents come into our school with pride that they have some part in making the child's education better.
Now, what does this have to do with anything? We need to love each other. We need to look at each other through eyes of only a Savior could. We need to be able to put aside the luxuries in life and see people as people. Yes, people are mean, and no we don't have all of the same ideas about what should be done, but we are all the same. We came into this world the same, and we will all go out the same. Whether we are in a pine box or in the most expensive casket or monument available, we all will die. Now, what will you do what the in between? The moment between your birth and your death. Will you love others or will you only look for what you can do to get ahead?
The families of Sandy Hook Elementary are mourning the death of their children. Do you think they are really concerned about how much money they have? Do you think they are concerned for what they will be doing next week at the school PTO? Do you think they are concerned about the value of their home or the car they are driving? They are only concerned with the loss of a child they will never see again this side of Heaven. So many people are asking why something like this could happen. Do you think it's because of gun laws or the mentally ill or because of a learning disability? No, it's because somewhere along the way someone forgot to show the love of Jesus to someone. Maybe it was the killer's mother or father. Maybe it was a teacher or a friend. May he didn't make the grade or reach what he thought was the place he needed to be in life. Maybe he was made fun of for being "different" when the truth of the matter is that none of us are truly alike in our minds. We were all raised and influenced by different people. If we all were influenced by the same people the same way, we would all be the same.
We just need to pray and ask God to help us to love others as He'd love them. Yes, there are things we need to stay away from, but we can love people and be concerned for their souls. We need to love people.
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Oh, I want to see Him
Well, I was sitting here trying to work on homework, and all of a sudden, my heart started longing for Jesus. I thought back to my sister's death a few months ago. I thought of how that hospital room was for everyone. Some people saw it as an end to a life, but others saw it as the beginning of eternity. I was think about how Carliea is able to be in the presence of Jesus right now. I'm so excited for her! I long to be with Jesus. I want a heart willing to seek after Him continually.
I know when people go home to be with Jesus we really miss them. We think about all of the times we have spent together. We think about the times we passed up chances to be with them. I wonder how much we do this with our Savior. Why are our hearts not longing more to see Him in Heaven than a family member? The answer - relationship. We had a relationship with the people who went on, but do we really have a relationship with Jesus? Do we really spend time with Him? Do we really get to know Him? If we did, we would have a true desire to see Him. We would be longing for the day to be able to be in His presence.
I want to spend more time with Jesus. There are days when my life is so full. I was just talking to a friend yesterday, and she was saying how things are going by so fast. We need to slow down and spend time with Jesus.
My oldest son has been wanting to do family devotions every night before bed! I love this (although sometimes I wonder if it isn't just a excuse to try and stay up a little long). Excuse or not, I'm glad he is wanting to spend time talking about God and telling Bible stories. He also wants to pray together. Last night, he said the best prayer for our family and our friends. I'm so proud of him!
So, we need to spend time with Jesus today and have the longing in our hearts to one day see Him!
I know when people go home to be with Jesus we really miss them. We think about all of the times we have spent together. We think about the times we passed up chances to be with them. I wonder how much we do this with our Savior. Why are our hearts not longing more to see Him in Heaven than a family member? The answer - relationship. We had a relationship with the people who went on, but do we really have a relationship with Jesus? Do we really spend time with Him? Do we really get to know Him? If we did, we would have a true desire to see Him. We would be longing for the day to be able to be in His presence.
I want to spend more time with Jesus. There are days when my life is so full. I was just talking to a friend yesterday, and she was saying how things are going by so fast. We need to slow down and spend time with Jesus.
My oldest son has been wanting to do family devotions every night before bed! I love this (although sometimes I wonder if it isn't just a excuse to try and stay up a little long). Excuse or not, I'm glad he is wanting to spend time talking about God and telling Bible stories. He also wants to pray together. Last night, he said the best prayer for our family and our friends. I'm so proud of him!
So, we need to spend time with Jesus today and have the longing in our hearts to one day see Him!
Saturday, August 25, 2012
The First Week of School 2012
Well, it started out to be a good school year. The boys have great teachers, and they seem to be happy. I am a happy mom, too! I pray for their teachers - past and present - during the summer before school starts again. I really pray they have teachers who will lead them to be more than they are, but also, I pray for God to protect them from things they shouldn't know.
Bayker has been coming up with some really theological questions lately. I know he is a very intelligent boy, but Wow! I didn't ask these questions until I was in my 20's. I pray God will protect his mind from lies that are in this world that will redirect him from God. I also pray this for Jaxon.
We will be traveling to Charleston on Monday to have Jaxon fitted for his hearing aids. I am excited and can hardly wait for his first reaction to what he has never heard. Did you know that a baby's ears are formed to their fullest between 6 and 7 weeks gestation? I didn't either until I started researching what happened to Jaxon's hears to have a malformation. I can't believe it was so early in the womb. I worry Jaxon will be shunned or be made an outcast because of his hearing aids. I hope no one at school notices his hearing aids after Monday. I think once he goes in with them it won't be a big deal, but as a parent, you worry.
I start school again on September 1st. I have to get into the boy's rooms and get them cleared out a little bit in order for them to sit in their rooms and do homework. They each have a desk, so I'm getting excited for them to have a quiet place to work.
Stephen is doing well at work. He has been having whole body pains for some time now, but the doctor gave him some meds to help, and he seems to be in better spirits as well as feeling better physically. I just pray it continues to be this way.
Well, this is what's going on in the Mahan house. I hope you all are having a great start to a great year as well.
Bayker has been coming up with some really theological questions lately. I know he is a very intelligent boy, but Wow! I didn't ask these questions until I was in my 20's. I pray God will protect his mind from lies that are in this world that will redirect him from God. I also pray this for Jaxon.
We will be traveling to Charleston on Monday to have Jaxon fitted for his hearing aids. I am excited and can hardly wait for his first reaction to what he has never heard. Did you know that a baby's ears are formed to their fullest between 6 and 7 weeks gestation? I didn't either until I started researching what happened to Jaxon's hears to have a malformation. I can't believe it was so early in the womb. I worry Jaxon will be shunned or be made an outcast because of his hearing aids. I hope no one at school notices his hearing aids after Monday. I think once he goes in with them it won't be a big deal, but as a parent, you worry.
I start school again on September 1st. I have to get into the boy's rooms and get them cleared out a little bit in order for them to sit in their rooms and do homework. They each have a desk, so I'm getting excited for them to have a quiet place to work.
Stephen is doing well at work. He has been having whole body pains for some time now, but the doctor gave him some meds to help, and he seems to be in better spirits as well as feeling better physically. I just pray it continues to be this way.
Well, this is what's going on in the Mahan house. I hope you all are having a great start to a great year as well.
Saturday, August 11, 2012
Another summer ending and another school year beginning
I have to say that some summer have been harder than others. I know we can never predict the future and that our plans seem to change often. I was thinking about the summer and the ones from the past.
It was only two years ago when I ended up staying with Stephen's mom, Retha, the entire summer. She had been diagnosed with brain cancer, had surgery, started and ended treatment, and, then, went back home. It was a crazy summer filled with long drives to Knoxville for treatment days and long weekends with Stephen flying in to be able to see his family after a week at work.
Then, last summer, we celebrated. Stephen and I had been married for 10 years. There have been times in our marriage when things were not easy, but God brought us through them. We were able to have a small ceremony and reception to celebrate.
Now, this summer - started with a staycation. We had a blast being tourist in Myrtle Beach. We only wished it would have been able to last longer. We went to Tennessee in order to see my sister, Carliea, for her birthday. She had been diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma and had some swelling. We brought Rayvn back for a two week visit, but it was cut short by the call - Carliea was dying. We left and rushed to Tennessee. 6 1/2 hours, not 8, is how long it took us to get there in order to be with her for an hour and a half before he went to be with Jesus. We spent the next few days trying to process her death and plan the funeral. We spent the next week trying to celebrate the 4th of July. It didn't seem the same. Of course, how could it. Then, we came home.
Jaxon saw the audiologist again, and we were informed he would be fitted for hearing aids. We are trying to process how life is going to be after this transition. We are praying he will adjust and accept what he has to do. I'm praying I won't lose my mind worrying about whether he has decided to throw them away or destroy them. Lord, help us if he does.
School starts for the boys in a week and a half. I should start back on September 1st. Stephen, of course, is still working. Bless his heart. Life is trying to go back to what we call normal. Although, after this summer, I don't know if I will ever feel normal again. So many ups and downs over the last couple of years. Life keeps coming at us. I guess we have to trust in the Lord, and lean not on our own understanding. In all our ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct our paths.
It was only two years ago when I ended up staying with Stephen's mom, Retha, the entire summer. She had been diagnosed with brain cancer, had surgery, started and ended treatment, and, then, went back home. It was a crazy summer filled with long drives to Knoxville for treatment days and long weekends with Stephen flying in to be able to see his family after a week at work.
Then, last summer, we celebrated. Stephen and I had been married for 10 years. There have been times in our marriage when things were not easy, but God brought us through them. We were able to have a small ceremony and reception to celebrate.
Now, this summer - started with a staycation. We had a blast being tourist in Myrtle Beach. We only wished it would have been able to last longer. We went to Tennessee in order to see my sister, Carliea, for her birthday. She had been diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma and had some swelling. We brought Rayvn back for a two week visit, but it was cut short by the call - Carliea was dying. We left and rushed to Tennessee. 6 1/2 hours, not 8, is how long it took us to get there in order to be with her for an hour and a half before he went to be with Jesus. We spent the next few days trying to process her death and plan the funeral. We spent the next week trying to celebrate the 4th of July. It didn't seem the same. Of course, how could it. Then, we came home.
Jaxon saw the audiologist again, and we were informed he would be fitted for hearing aids. We are trying to process how life is going to be after this transition. We are praying he will adjust and accept what he has to do. I'm praying I won't lose my mind worrying about whether he has decided to throw them away or destroy them. Lord, help us if he does.
School starts for the boys in a week and a half. I should start back on September 1st. Stephen, of course, is still working. Bless his heart. Life is trying to go back to what we call normal. Although, after this summer, I don't know if I will ever feel normal again. So many ups and downs over the last couple of years. Life keeps coming at us. I guess we have to trust in the Lord, and lean not on our own understanding. In all our ways, acknowledge Him, and He will direct our paths.
Sunday, July 8, 2012
In Only a Few Days
Well, as you can imagine, life seems to be getting back to what we can somewhat call normal. I can't get Carliea off of my mind. I have a picture of all of us back in 2006 on my mantle. Carliea was sitting in her wheelchair, and we were all gathered around her. It is a beautiful picture of our wonderful, but disfunctional family. We are just like every other family with their problems. But, the proof that you are family is this: it doesn't matter what happens, you are there for each other.
One of the preachers at Carliea's funeral said we should buy flowers for those when we are alive, not after someone passes away. I am not sure if I had ever bought flowers for her while she was alive, but Stephen and I had done several things for her. God was good to us, and we tried to bless her as we could spare. We, through God's provisions, were able to buy her a computer. For years, she was unable to leave the house, but when she had the computer, she was able to get on the internet and start her college classes. She also was able to produce a newsletter for her church. She was a blessing for so many people through what she could do. She was able to get on the internet and talk to friends and to do her blog....which I miss.
Don't wait until someone is gone to let them know how much they mean to you! Tell them now while they can hear you. Carliea always thought she didn't have any talents, but her spirit and her intelligents were her talents. I told her that often. Tell those you love that you love them and encourage them in whatever they do. You may be the rainbow in their day or life.
One of the preachers at Carliea's funeral said we should buy flowers for those when we are alive, not after someone passes away. I am not sure if I had ever bought flowers for her while she was alive, but Stephen and I had done several things for her. God was good to us, and we tried to bless her as we could spare. We, through God's provisions, were able to buy her a computer. For years, she was unable to leave the house, but when she had the computer, she was able to get on the internet and start her college classes. She also was able to produce a newsletter for her church. She was a blessing for so many people through what she could do. She was able to get on the internet and talk to friends and to do her blog....which I miss.
Don't wait until someone is gone to let them know how much they mean to you! Tell them now while they can hear you. Carliea always thought she didn't have any talents, but her spirit and her intelligents were her talents. I told her that often. Tell those you love that you love them and encourage them in whatever they do. You may be the rainbow in their day or life.
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)